I spotted this unidentified fluffy object on the stairs this evening.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Bollinger, who posed for this photo today.

This week's pin-up is a dainty damselfly - possibly called Deirdre. Damselflies have made a comeback in England in recent weeks, after flying off to the continent in a huff in 1952. Good to know our damsels are no longer in distress.

Bolly - before and after (slim photo taken on 17 July 2010)

Breaking News. Bolly's no longer plump. In fact, she's verging on slim. For the first time ever.

This is thanks to her new Royal Canin Satiety Support diet.

Well done Boll!

This week's pin-up is a friendly Shih Tzu I met on the ferry to Mull. He only spoke Gaelic, so I have very few details. But I'm going to call him Hamish and assume he lives on a croft with an elderly sheep and a small hen.

I was at BBC Wales yesterday to record links for a Radio 4 programme. And I had some last-minute clips to edit, so I popped into the newsroom and grabbed a computer.

One of the recordings featured a dramatic vocal performance by Bolly who plays a cameo role in the feature. And - instead of wearing headphones - I decided to listen quietly on a speaker.

There were producers and reporters nearby, who had no idea who I was or what I was up to as I skulked in the corner hidden behind my PC.

'Is that a cat?' asked one, looking perplexed. 'Or am I hearing things?'

'I think it's a kitten,' replied another. 'Is it in the bulletin?'

'Not sure. Maybe it's in here.'

Then another producer chipped in.

'I think it's the seagulls outside. They can make some pretty odd noises.'

'But they sound like they're impersonating a cat...'

And so it went on - until I came clean.

Here's a snippet of Bolly's performance. See what you think. Does she sound like a kitten? Or a seagull? Or a newsreader?

Why not play it in the office (if you work in one) and see what response you get?

This week's pin-up is the cute cygnet who's currently living with his parents on the River Lea in Hertford. Unusually for swans, he's an only child.

Boll's had several furry babies this week. Yes - she's moulting again, and currently resembles a scruffy (but cute) ferret.

This week's pin-up is the bird which perched on the Algeria goal post during the England v Algeria World Cup match. There was very little chance of it being disturbed. It eventually got bored and flew off, having provided a lot more entertainment than the England team.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Mouse (aka Mini Mouse) who lives with Fran in a delightful Edwardian house in North London.

Mouse is extremely sweet but quite shy. So I was delighted when she decided I wasn't a dangerous predator and visited me in the kitchen.

I took this photo in the hallway, where Mouse was resting after chasing a bit of scrunched up paper attached to a piece of string.

The weekly pet pin-up is back, by popular demand.

This week's pin-up is the marvellous Max who lives with Karen in Hawaii. Max is probably a Polish Lowland Sheepdog. But, in the absence of sheep, he's pursued an alternative vocation as a guard dog, with his headquarters under Karen's chair.

His hobbies include dragging his mummy down the street and attacking towels which have been placed on the patio chairs for passing cats to sit on.

Bolly and I think he looks a bit like a Hawaiian surfer, with his long hair and good looks.

Breaking news. Boll has taken up yoga. Here she is, demonstrating the lotus position.

Bolly helped me in the garden today. She then fell fast asleep due to the effort.

Not content with her radio appearances, Bolly's now to be found on the television most mornings.

As you can see, I have a chunky old TV set. I'd quite like a flatscreen one, but Boll wouldn't be able to sleep on it.

I thought I'd seen it all - until tonight, when I popped into the kitchen to make a cuppa. And there was Bollinger, brazenly eating ... a chip. Yes ... a chip. Quite a large one too. I'd given her a bit of haddock earlier, so I assume she'd decided a chip would go nicely with it. I think she might be turning human. Must keep an eye on the ketchup.

Love you Dexter

hyper-intelligent dog owner Paris Hilton

According to Bristol University research, cat owners are cleverer than dog owners. This is of course true. Although, as someone wrote in today's Independent, cats don't have owners - they just 'lease their services to gullible people.'

The research also sheds light on recent experiments suggesting that dogs are more intelligent than cats. This was based on their respective willingness to follow a piece of string, or something equally stupid. The cats didn't do it.

But this was clearly because they just couldn't be bothered.

Natasha and Peggy Sue

As you may know, my friends James and Jesus in Gran Canaria have a cute dog called Natasha. Well, Natasha now has a new flatmate - Peggy Sue the piglet. As you can see, they're already best pals.

Hi. Bolly and I are back home.

Boll behaved impeccably on the journey. Not a single miaow all the way from Newcastle to Hertford.

I put her woolly fleece in the catbox for her to sit on. But she decided to use it as a sort of duvet, disguising herself as a small sheep for the entire trip.

Have a lovely and relaxing time. Boll and I will be back online from January 5th 2010. Meanwhile, I will be tweeting, so do have a look at the Twitter column on the right if you want to follow our progress. Goodbye Noughties. See you in the next decade!

Today's Christmas pin-up is a plankton.

Today's Santa is a boll weevil. The boll weevil was very cooperative, having done catwalk in Milan and a couple of shoots for Insect Vogue.

Today's exclusive pin-up Santa is an amoeba. It was a difficult photoshoot. The amoeba was a complete diva and had issues about wearing a hat. But we got there eventually.

Yes. It's a rug.

This week's pin-up is Snowball - a plump albino hedgehog. Thank you to Heather for telling me about him.

He's now on a strict diet and exercise regime at St Tiggywinkles

Here he is, posing with a friend, being weighed, and having his daily swim in a bath...

I've just read Dewey - The Smalltown Library Cat Who Touched The World, and I really enjoyed it. It's not a literary read, but it is a touching feel-good book about an amazing cat.

On the coldest night of the year, Dewey was abandoned in a library drop-box. The librarians were surprised to find a frozen, bedraggled kitten among the returned books, but thankfully managed to revive him.

He went on to live in the library, charm the town and become an international star. The book tells the story of him and his adoptive mummy Vicki the head librarian, with interesting bits about smalltown life in rural Iowa.

I couldn't stop reading it and even cried at the end.

Bolly doesn't like it when I get my little Antler suitcase out, because she knows it means I'm going away. Now she has a solution. She's taken to using it as a sofa. She knows I don't like shoving her off things. She also knows it'll be covered in cat hairs before long, and will look too dishevelled to take out of the house.

This week's pin-ups are the jazz hamsters in the new Drench ad They were tempted to play the mini instruments with the help of peanut butter and Nutella.

This week's topical pin-up is a water vole

This week's pin-up is a cute shaggy puppy.

Bolly bit my nose this morning, in a silly random moment when we were play-fighting.

She just saw my nose and bit it. It only took half an hour to stop the bleeding. And the gaping gash went very well with my ghoulish limp.

The limp was caused not by a cat but a horse.

Ding's the most mild-mannered horse on earth and I was so relaxed I lost my concentration when I was taking him for a walk.

That was the point at which he accidentally stood on my toe. It just lasted half a second, but Ding weighs a ton - literally.

Thankfully, there was a hosepipe nearby, and cold water for ten minutes did help a bit.

As accidents are supposed to happen in threes, I'm planning to avoid all animals today.

This week's pin-up is a cute baby koala.

As you can see, Bolly's looking much slimmer - just three weeks into her diet.

before and after

You may recall Spud - the bald hedgehog - featured on Peacockshock a while ago.

Good news. He's hedgehogging the limelight again because he's now grown some spikes after a stay at the Tiggywinkles hedgehog hospital.

They tried various pampering treatments, including regular massages with baby oil, and they worked.

Well done Tiggywinkles. Congratulations Spud.

Spud-we-like.

This week’s pin-up is a pygmy possum who’s been in the news in Australia.

Apparently, a firefighter discovered this pyromaniac possumlet in his pocket after a day spent battling with blazes.

The possum was completely unharmed and he placed it in the hollow of a tree to recover from its unexpected day’s work experience.

Boll and I were most amused to watch this video of a box-obsessed cat

This week's pin-up is a kitten, listening to music on an iPod.

I've just discovered the Dutch painter Henriëtte Ronner-Knip (1821-1909) who clearly loved cats (and kittens).

Boll had her first weigh-in at the vets today - two weeks into the new diet. And she's down from 6.4 kg to 6.1 kg. The vet said that's very good progress. Well done Bollykins.

This week's pin-up is a dormouse. Dormice can hibernate for more than six months a year. Their name is derived from 'dormeus', which means 'sleepy one'.

Bollinger's definitely looking trimmer and her new nickname is Slimline. I'm being very strict with her diet, but she has had afternoon tea a couple of times this week - taken from her dinner quota.

This morning, she ran up and down the stairs howling - which she hasn't done for a while.

And she tried to climb into the smallest section of my gym rucksack, but didn't quite manage it.

I've just picked Bolly up and she definitely feels a bit lighter. The diet's working. I'm very excited. And the Boll seems to be getting used to it. She's also enjoying her food more, wolfing it, and licking her bowl clean. It's a blue Denby bowl by the way. Only the best for Madam.

It's 2pm and Bolly's doing high-pitched howling, like the Hound of the Baskervilles on helium. She's clearly after dinner - four hours early. Oh dear. Is it legal to shoot a pet cat with a tranquiliser dart - like they used to do with misbehaving lions on Daktari?

Bolly's now five days into her diet and coping very well, although she did demand breakfast at 4.57 am today. But we're perservering and she should be down to 5 grams before long. The first big weigh-in is in a week's time.

Bolly's responding well to her new diet of a thimble of food per meal. But there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth from 3 till 5 pm today, so she had dinner at 5.30 instead of 6. She's already looking slightly slimmer.

This week's pin-up (back by popular demand) is the lovely Dexter from Waltham Abbey. He's a cat but likes people to think he's an undiscovered type of cuscus. Dexter's hobbies include purring, shouting and eating processed ham.

Socrates from Newcastle - 10kg - much fatter than the Boll

Bolly now weighs 6.4 kg - that's one stone. So - with help from the wondrous Chestnut Vets in Hertford - she's just gone on a new, stricter diet. Her target is to get down to 4 kg (9 pounds) asap. Her diet consists of 50 g of Feline RD diet food a day. And she'll be weighed once a fortnight.

So far, it's gone pretty well. I bought a digital weighing scale yesterday and worked out that 25 g (one meal) exactly fills one of my little cocktail glasses, so that's become our measure.

She now has to go from Hattie Jacques to Charles Hawtrey. I'll keep you posted.

I recall seeing a leaflet advertising cat diet food a few years ago which boasted astonishing results. Willow the cat, it claimed, had gone down from 7 kg to 5 g (5 grams) in just a month. They'd clearly left the 'k' out by mistake. Boll and I found this most amusing.

This week's pin-up is a Bosavi Silky Cuscus - a new species. Cuscuses are shy and sweet marsupials that live high in the trees. They look a bit like teddy bears, but they're actually part monkey, part sloth.

I want one.

Bolly has asked me to point out that she shares most of her characteristics with a sloth, is frequently a cheeky monkey, and looks very much like a teddy bear.

She therefore believes that she is herself a new, undiscovered species - the Hertfordshire Pink-Nosed Cuscus.

I've just sent for a zoologist.

Gordon the cameraman discovers a giant woolly rat

I thoroughly enjoyed BBC1's Lost Land of the Volcano but have no idea why it was on after 9pm when it was so suitable for children. Anyway - the good news is that it's on iPlayer and will no doubt come out on DVD.

Basically - it was about an expedition to a forested volcano crater, Mount Bosavi, in Papua New-Guinea. The rainforest there was full of new species which no human had ever set eyes on.

And so, as you'd expect, the animals themselves had never seen a human. That's why they were so astonishingly friendly, having no idea how cruel we can be.

My favourite creatures were the Bosavi Silky Cuscus (see this week's pin-up) and a giant woolly rat, which was the size of a cat ... and very cute.

This week's pin-up is a sweet gerbil.

One of Boll's more eccentric habits is grooming herself and then forgetting to put her tongue back in her mouth. This can go on for ages. This evening, it lasted about 20 minutes. She clearly has no idea how daft she looks.

Bollinger this evening

Autumn has officially arrived. This was signified this evening by Boll's annual migration from her downstairs bed to her fluffy igloo, which is upstairs where it's warmer.

This week's pin-up (returning by popular demand) is the lovely Mouse, who lives with Fran in London.

This week's pin-up stars are two baby badgers.

I gave Bolly a fluffy tarantula for her birthday and it was a big hit.

Like all self-respecting spiders, it had lots of legs and a fluffy bit in the middle. But yesterday, the fluffy bit fell off. It was a wig. The tarantula was bald.

Boll was shocked at first, but she's started playing with the bald tarantula now and is ignoring its embarrassing hairpiece.

the toupée

This week's pin-up is a Madagascan tenrec. Tenrecs are a bit like hedgehogs. They have poor eyesight but very sensitive whiskers. And there's a cute tenrec family, with babies, at Paradise Wildlife Park here in Herts.

This baby tenrec has decided to hide in a teacup.

Here are some streaked tenrecs.

This tenrec appears to be having an encounter with an everyday hedgehog. This is by the artist *luve, who writes:

Tenrecs are forged, not born, from the inner core of an awesome volcano by thunder dwarves. They are a cross between a shrew and a thunder god. They are closely related to hedgehogs and pikachus.

Queen Boll grants an audience to her subject Jess, as long as he agrees to sit under her green plastic throne

This week's pin-up is a flying squirrel.

I was back at Paradise Wildlife Park this weekend. Here are some new pix.

an otter trying to drown his friend by pushing his head under the water

white lion cubs

baby snow leopard (snow leopards have evolved to be intrinsically blurred)

corsac fox

eagle owl, doing a scary walk to frighten predators

barn owl

I had a verry nice birfday. Hear are some photos.

First, I played wiv my new tarantullah.

An I played wiv me new yello feather fing.

Next, I sat on my flufy blue tower - like the qeen on a thron.

N then I jumpt down.

Then i had a nice reste on ians' gymme bag.

It wos a very nice day.

Bolly's 10 today. To celebrate, here are some previously-unpublished pix of her when she was a kitten.

Here are some pix I took at the excellent Paradise Wildlife Park at the weekend.

Red Panda

Ring-Tailed Lemur

Lynx

Pallas Cat

This week's pin-up is the lovely Libby-Lou, who writes: I am 14 months old. I am a rescue Patterdale Terrier cross. My hobbies include playing ball, burying things where they can still be seen, and twittering on libbyloupup.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Alexis from Waltham Abbey in Essex.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Bollinger.

I spent yesterday afternoon in London with the lovely Henry - Wilhelm and Guga's basset hound puppy. We went for a spin in the park, where we got caught in a thunderstorm. Henry responded by rolling around in a puddle and had to have a shower.

This week's pin-up is a cat in a filing cabinet. All filing cabinets should come with a cat in my opinion.

I've long been a fan of the Drama Chipmunk (a Prairie Dog to be pedantic) and so it's good to see he's been joined on YouTube by a Drama Pug and a Drama Cat

This week's pin-up is a fennec fox. Fennec foxes have big ears to dissipate the desert heat and to hear small creatures, such as locusts, walk on the sand.

This week's pin-up is a pleasing otter.

An encouraging harbinger for the economy. My Norwegian Spruce has suddenly developed green shoots.

This week's pin-up is a small white rabbit.

Bolly likes sitting next to me on the sofa when I'm reading and often falls asleep under the glare of the lamp. Her solution is ... to cover her eyes with her paws. This is exceedingly cute as you can see, and also very clever.

Boll and I gave the garden ivy its annual haircut today. It now looks like an old lady with a stiff perm.

Bolly's very partial to a stick with feathers on it. This is her latest one.

This week's pin-ups are a small hamster and a fluffy Alsatian.

This week's pin-up is the very handsome Ned from Bedfordshire. His hobbies include swimming and rounding up ducks on the river.

I bought a small bag of compost today in a local shop. I also bought a small pouch of cat food.

'I'd better not confuse the two,' I quipped.

Silence. And then ...

'Does your cat eat compost then? How unusual.'

I'm used to such literalism in the USA, but not here.

'No,' I replied. 'But she does like broccoli, asparagus and spring greens.' I then scuttled out as quickly as possible before it got any more confusing.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Archie. Archie is a lurcher and lives with Michael, Siobhán and Ned in Church End Bedfordshire.

Boll is very into the garden brush at the moment and likes sitting next to it.

.....I met a cat who wasn't there.
She wasn't there again today.
She's very cute I have to say.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Mouse, who lives with Fran in London. Mouse has many hobbies, including the inspection of Waitrose bags.

Bollinger amused the Senior Peacocks the other night with a new comedy sleeping position, defying the laws of gravity. The fluffy blue tower is supposed to be for climbing activities, but Boll's decided to redefine it as a bed.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Natasha Guittierez-Litchfield who has just moved in with my friends James and Jesus in Las Palmas.

This week's pin-up is the cute and adorable Rosie. Full name - Rosie Rocket the Rabbit in my Pocket. RRTRIMP lives in the wilds of Bedfordshire with Fi and Paul.

This week's pin-up is the fluffytastic Fenix, who lives with my friend Nikki in Cheshunt.

It's good to see that rabbit showjumping has now taken off in the UK.

I always enjoy visiting my friend Ding and did so this week.

posing with Henrietta and Franklin

Ding is having his nose tickled here. I believe this is a form of horse whispering.

This week's pin-up is handsome hunk Henry the baby basset hound, who's just moved in with my friends Wilhelm and Guga in London.

This week's topical pin-up is a Portuguese Water Dog

The garden is rapidly filling up with miscellaneous moggies of unknown provenance. Word has clearly got around that the famous Bollinger lives here. The latest addition is a scruffy-looking Persian who's clearly about 150. He's very friendly in an understated fashion, but Boll can't make sense of him and runs into the house whenever he appears.

This week's pin-up is Vincent the earless rabbit from Selby in Yorkshire. He's perfectly OK. He just has no ears.

Vincent

with his mum

Boll befriended a green bug today.

Boll and I have had bathroom fitters in over the last few weeks. We've also had a new water tank put in. And we had to have the roof redone as well.

Boll spent her formative kitten years living in a building site while the Oxford house was being renovated and so she's very philosophical about such things.

I'll put some bathroom pix up when I've totally finished pimping it up.

Grand Designs - the project manager oversees proceedings from her pouffe

Bothered? Do I look bothered?

a night on the tiles

This week's pin-up is the lovely Kobi.

Kobi is a Tibetan Terrier and lives with Andrew and Paula in London.

This week's pin-up is Spud the cute spineless hedgehog who lives at the Tiggywinkles sanctuary.

This week's pin-up is a kitten with his baby monkey pal.

Bolly decided to lurk like a troll under a fluffy throw on the sofa for most of today, occasionally peeping out to see what was going on.

By popular demand - the Peacockshock Pin-Up of the Week is back. This week's pin-up is the gorgeous Gagarin from Lincoln who lives with Lea and Mr Lion Tamer.

It was warm today (at least in the sun) and Bolly decided to actually go out into the garden and stay there for more than five minutes. A first for 2009.

Like a groundhog leaving its burrow, this is a clear harbinger of a wondrous spring.

Skippy - the only surviving photo

36 years ago this morning, I removed the cover from Tog the guinea pig's hutch to give him breakfast. Tog was a plump male g pig. He'd become increasingly rotund since arriving chez Peacock in December 1972.

And there, in front of my very eyes, on the sawdust in front of his wooden breakfast ledge, was Tog ... with four unbelievably cute babies.

Tog was considerably slimmer than he'd been the night before and looked rather proud of himself. Herself.

1st February 1973 was one of the happiest days of my life and I always remember it with a small tear in my eye. Three of the piglets were fluffy and multicoloured. One was short-haired and mostly black. I called her Skippy because of her habit of randomly jumping in the air for no reason, and she lived with her mum for a very happy three years. The other piglets were adopted by friends.

Tog lived till she was almost seven and was my best friend throughout my teenage years. She was very tame and often sat on my lap to watch TV.

I'll never forget Tog and Skippy.

Boll loves bags and often gets ridiculously tangled up in my Cannons rucksack. She also makes a beeline for paper bags and sits on them, even if there are comfy chairs and cushions nearby.

Boll has spent a large part of today running around with a Farrow & Farrow bag on her head. It's a fabulous delicatessen. Good to know that the Boll has such good taste.

Bolly on New Year's Day

All the best for 2009 from me and the Boll. We're now back from our peregrinations.

Ian finelly got a bigg tree yesterday. It looked sad in Van Hagues gardin centr, like Paddinten Bear saying 'please look after this beare'. I decoratted it wiv baurbels, n it looks quit cool now. Bolla x

pic I took of meself

Hello

azxaczaszatb

Sorry - big paws make typinge hard.

Ian's been very busy and asked me to pologize for his tempirary absence. He says he's gonna do lots of peacocksnop news this weekend.

L8RS

Da Boll xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

typical Bollinger expression

posing on the fluffy blue tower

in the kitchen, keeping an eye on the oven

Bolly, enjoying a stroll in the garden this week

I spent a splendid afternoon with my friend Amina Z on Primrose Hill the other day. We (well, I) had some very pleasing lemon cake at The Tea Cosy and we tried to spot some celebrities. All celebrities have to live there by law.

I was hoping for a sighting of someone like Enrique Iglesias or Sienna Miller or Joan Bakewell, but I had to make do with someone who may or may not be in The Bill or Casualty. We also walked past what may very possibly have been Jamie Oliver's house.

And we saw lots of chichi dogs which seemed as if they probably belonged to very famous people. They included two komondors, a chihuahua and a pomeranian.

a pomeranian

Oh dear. Boll has a new hobby. I always feared we were too close to Essex.

Great excitement. Boll's just had a weigh-in at the vets and she's lost weight.

This may be thanks to her new food ball - a plastic contraption which I fill with dry cat food. She then has to chase it in order to release her dinner. She's still over 6kg. But she has lost a massive 100 grams. Congratulations Boll.

Binx - who recently found a new home thanks to The Scratching Post

Thank you to Deb for telling me about The Scratching Post - a fantastic cat rescue shelter near Cheshunt. If you live in Hertfordshire and would like to give a cat a loving home, The Scratching Post is the place to visit.

Thank you to Tammy from Massachusetts for informing me that the gorgeous cat and guinea pig featured in a previous Peacockshock pin-up are in fact her pets Armand (cat) and Titania (guinea pig). Sadly, Titania passed away a few months ago from old age.

Tammy runs a brilliant guinea pig portal, called cavymadness which has some great stuff on it, including snaps of various 'pignics'.

She's also a top pet photographer. Check out her site for some very cute pix.

My favourite silly season story of 2008 has to be the tale of Nick Boing - a 22 stone ram who lives in his own bungalow in a Cardiff suburb.

He was adopted by the Palmer family when he was a stray lamb and he's lived with them ever since. He used to sleep on the bed, but now he's too big. Nick enjoys sitting on the sofa watching television and eating biscuits and often goes for walks on a lead and trips in the car.

Nick when he was a lamb

Happy 9th birthday to Bolly, her sister Tigger and their two fluffy brothers. The Boll spent this afternoon playing with her new toy - a hedgehog on a stick. And she's having Whiskas Organic Chicken for dinner.

Boll, posing for a birthday portrait today

Boll left her tongue sticking out (for several minutes) after grooming this morning and then crossed her legs in a camp fashion.

Bollinger was delighted to read in today's gossip columns that Daniel 'James Bond' Craig is one of her biggest fans.

Boll and Jess having a siesta in the lounge yesterday

Boll has really taken to my new eco-friendly Waitrose shopping bag and has virtually lived in it this weekend.

Talking of Eco-Boll, my friend's mum is quite environmentally friendly but prone to malapropisms. This may explain why she swears by 'ecobolical' washing powder.

My friend Christian, who rarely strays out of London, came to Hertford for dinner last night and met the rotund Bolly for the first time.

'What a beautiful cat!' he enthused. 'Wow! And she's pregnant too!'

Boll and her friend Jess spent today in the garden. More precisely, they spent it on the new garden furniture, which meant I had to sit on the doorstep during my breaks from painting the house.

Bollinger spent today familiarising herself with the new garden furniture.

Bolly and I had a visit yesterday - from Pixie the Papillon. Boll normally gets on well with dogs, but she seemed utterly mystified by Pixie and just watched her from a safe distance.

My theory is that Boll thought Pixie was a cat in disguise. They're both about the same size and Pixie isn't conspicuously dog-like. It's difficult to imagine her, say, cast as the Hound of the Baskervilles, looming out of the mists of Dartmoor, howling and baring her teeth.

a nice stretch in the sun

a touch of light floristry

a snooze on the duvet

Today's cat appears to be disguising himself as a chicken.

Today's extremely silly-looking cat is from Japan.

Today's cat is wearing a mystical golden hat.

Introducing an exciting new feature. The Daily Cat in a Hat. Inspired by Bolly's fetching 1951 station master's cap, the feature will continue until I run out of cats. If the Daily Cat in a Hat proves popular, it may very well be replaced by another species in a hat - termite in a trilby, bee in a bonnet, beaver in a beret, binturong in a bowler, hoopoe in a helmet - or whatever.

Boll didn't want to be outdone by her Japanese lookalike Tama, so has donned a 1951 station master's hat and is rumoured to be taking over at Hertford North.

My friend Ding the horse has just moved house to a new yard quite near to Hertford. He seems to be settling in very well and did a Hello-style photoshoot yesterday with his human Henrietta.

Hello from deepest Essex, where I'm cat-sitting for a few days. My three adorable fluffy hosts are Dexter the chocolate Persian, Alexis the silver Persian and Maud the mini-moglet. Boll is being expertly cat-sat by friends in Hertford.

Dex and Lex (impersonating a snowy owl)

Dex and Maud

Maud, auditioning to be an extra on Dr Who

Alexis - insisting I should have yet another screen break

Echo - a golden retriever from Cheshire - was in the news today for adopting a bunch of orphaned kittens. She now looks after them along with her puppies and doesn't seem to care what species they are.

Boll spent this afternoon sunbathing and grooming herself on a beach towel in the garden.

Boll poses for the paparazzi on the window sill

Meanwhile, Jess agrees to a photoshoot with Ian's new heather plants

Jess seems fine after last week's drama. He's been in the garden most days this week and popped into the house this morning to visit Bollinger. I was worried he'd associate me with his hostage crisis, as I was virtually the only person he saw during it, but he doesn't seem remotely bothered.

Jess is still in the house. He was sitting on the sofa and looking very much at home when I peeped through the front window this morning. I could then hear enthusiastic crunching noises when I posted his breakfast through the door.

There was a dramatic breakthrough yesterday, when he cleverly managed to nudge some letters on the hallway table, so my neighbour's full name and phone details were clearly visible through the letterbox. But an internet search produced no mobile numbers or useful details.

Meanwhile, my other neighbours explored the idea of breaking in. They climbed a ladder to see whether the bedroom windows might be easier than downstairs. But they were securely locked, so we're going to wait till this afternoon before trying anything more drastic (such as removing a window pane to get in).

It's snowing outside, but these houses are pretty warm in cold weather and he's quite furry, so I'm not too bothered about the temperature.

Hopefully the neighbour who's unwittingly imprisoning him will get back soon.

Thanks for the messages. I'll keep you posted.

Thanks for your messages of concern.

The home-alone cat is fine this morning. He's still in the house (neighbour definitely away) but he seems very perky and wolfed the dry cat food which I popped through the letterbox at 9am. I then posted a clean, wet sponge for him to lick if he gets thirsty.

The RSPCA said he should be fine for a day or two. Cats are better at coping with such crises than dogs. And my neighbour will almost certainly be back early tomorrow afternoon, to find the house full of cat food, sponges and whatever presents the cat decides to leave for her.

It's 9pm and the cat's still in there. My neighbour seems to have disappeared. The RSPCA say he'll be OK overnight and I've put some dry cat food through the letterbox for his supper. He seems very active and quite jolly, considering.

If my neighbour's not back by late morning Saturday, there may be a rescue attempt. Watch this space.

Breaking Mews.

It all started this morning, when I heard distant, spectral miaowing. It sounded like Boll's friend Jess the black cat, but he was nowhere to be seen.

I was worried he might be in the shed or stuck behind a wall and searched the entire garden. No sign. But the distant yowling continued.

In the end, I decided I was imagining it. I even started to think, somewhat morbidly, that he might have died and his ghost was haunting us. His cries were oddly distant and muffled.

Then I recalled his alarming habit of following people silently into the house in the dark. And I had a flashback to hearing my next door neighbour setting off extremely early this morning.

So I peeped through the letterbox. There he was, peeping out.

I couldn't get hold of my neighbour, so I propped open the letterbox with a copy of The Times to let some extra air in.

I also phoned the police for advice. They kindly offered to kick the front door in. But I decided that may not go down too well.

So we now have to stay calm and wait till about 7pm. I've stuck a note on the door to warn my neighbour, just in case Jess hurtles howling out of the door in a frenzied flurry of fur.

As you might expect, Boll has shown very little interest in the unfolding drama.

This is a premonition of me in a few years' time. The kindly madwoman in this clip rescues strays and has 130 Moscow moggies in her small flat. They look pretty happy and healthy to me, despite the slight overcrowding issue. I've not been able to verify whether it's real or not, but I have seen this VT played on what appears to be a genuine Russian news programme.

Introducing the lovely Dolly from Ware. Dolly lives with her friend Iain and likes to gaze affectionately at him through her picture window. Her flatmates include a penguin fish, a very fetching molly and a small, slightly nervous neon tetra. Dolly's beautifully appointed and deceptively spacious waterside apartment is in a sought-after location in the lounge and has many state-of-the-art features, including pink flowers and a statue of Hollywood heart-throb Nemo.

I'm dreaming of a white Easter - just like the ones we used to know.

Boll has spent most of today asleep on the duvet.

I noticed the cover of Nintendo Cats and Dogs today in a shop and was struck by the astounding similarity between the Nintendo cat and Bolly (pictured right - as a kitten). Clearly she's been modelling behind my back to fund her Whiskas habit.

Boll surfaced this afternoon and went to the vets for her manicure (or is it pedicure?) She's normally very cute and adorable at the vets, but she wasn't in the mood today and hissed throughout her beauty treatment like some crazed diva. Thankfully she's calmed down now and is being cherubic again.

Boll at my parents' house last week

Every time someone sees Bolly at the moment, they either say she's lost or put on weight. I've no idea. As I see her every day, her various rotundity adjustments aren't noticeable.

Today I decided to take her to the vets for a manicure and shut the bedroom door to stop her hiding in one of her nooks. Being Bollinger, she instantly knew there was something up, charged upstairs, hurled herself at the door like a fluffy battering ram, managed to open it and shot under the bed where she's now lurking in an inaccessible corner.

Meanwhile, Jess the black cat contuinues to visit us most days. Boll gave him an Eskimo (Inuit?) Kiss yesterday, which looked very sweet.

Monty was a real sweety and one of my all-time favourite cats. He lived in Cambridge and then Norfolk and spent his holidays in Impington. I'll always have very fond memories of him and I'm very glad I visited him in 2006 when he was quite elderly but clearly extremely happy. Bless him. We'll all miss him very much.

This week's pin-up is a squirrel, eating nuts outside my bedroom window this week.

This week's pin-up is the long-eared jerboa. It lives in the Gobi Desert, has cute furry feet, hops like a kangaroo and has just been filmed for the first time ever. The video really is worth watching if you like sweet and eccentric animals.

This week's topical pin-ups are four orphaned baby hedgehogs (aka 'hedgehoglets' according to the OED) who decided to adopt a garden brush as their mummy. Baby hedgehogs are having a bad winter because the chaotic weather has made them too weak to hibernate. If you find one, don't give it milk and water. Much better to give it cat or dog food. And - if your hedgehoglet's looking very thin or ill - inform your local hedgehog centre or the RSPCA.

baby hedgehog on the mend at Tiggywinkles Hospital

This week's pin-up is a baby tapir. Tapirs are shy and solitary creatures. They like wallowing in mud and have very flexible snouts which can move in all directions. In the mythology of Japanese Anime and Manga cartoons, they can eat dreams.

I left a Nike shoebox in the lounge last week and Bolly's decided it's a cat sofa. Despite all the nice soft carpeting which surrounds it, she now sits, sleeps and generally hangs out on the shoebox for a large part of the day. I've asked her to explain why, but she remains enigmatic.

Bollinger having a lie-in this morning

Bolly and I are feeling both snug and smug this morning. Having deliberately left the heating on last night, it's warm as toast in the house despite the frost. Boll briefly surfaced for breakfast but has now gone back to bed to have a sleep on my jumper.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Monty from Inverness. Monty's a Japanese Spitz. His favourite hobby is having his tummy tickled.

This week's pin-ups are the lovely Jasper and Pebble Fink from London.

Jasper

Pebble

This week's pin-up is the beautiful Beegee Bijou from north London. A Singapura cat, she lives with her daughter Solitaire and their pet human Lynne. Beegee Bijou's hobbies include running up and down the stairs with Solitaire. Thanks to Amina for the fab photos.

Jess has now started talking to Boll through the bedroom window by climbing up the tiles like Romeo. Boll has ignored his serenades so far. I'll keep you posted if there are any developments.

Bolly spent this morning lounging around watching her favourite video - Cool for Cats - which features various scuttling rodents and fidgeting fowls. She just sat there most of the time, but occasionally leapt up to claw the screen. Her favourite bit at the moment is the bluetit sequence.

This week's pin-ups are the lovely Alfie and Molly - Jack Russells from Banbury and Oxford. Alfie's the one in the rather fetching hoody. Molly's the fluffier one. They both get on very well and are famous for their habit of 'turbo' charging up and down the house.

In fact, the first ever officially-recognised Jack Russell was from Oxford. He was called Trump and was owned by the Reverend John Russell (born 1795) - hence the name.

This week's hunky pin-up is dishy Dennis from Knebworth, who lives with Joe and Chris.

Henrietta and Frank's rabbit Martha was a lovely bunny and great friend to Humphrey.

This week's pin-up is a ferret.

This week's pin-up is a dogsbane beetle.

Boll, having a siesta on her favourite garden chair this afternoon

Jess managed to get onto the roof this evening, which confused Bollinger. Boll isn't much of a climber thanks to her gravitational challenges and looked astonished that he'd managed to get up there.

I've no idea what I was supposed to do today or whether I did it.

This is because my entire schedule was on my whiteboard and Bollinger knocked it over, sat on it and fidgeted around. Being somewhat rotund and exceedingly fluffy, she managed to act as a giant board eraser.

Jess and Boll had a relatively amicable chat tonight, with only the occasional threatening howl. At one point, Jess ran into the house, grabbed the tail of Boll's favourite brown mouse and skidaddled out with it in his mouth. I apprehended him as Boll looked on in shock. They then got bored with each other and Boll pottered back into the house. It's all very dramatic stuff. I fear they may be turning into emos.

This week's pin-up is a ring-tailed lemur.

Ring-tailed lemurs (named after the 13 rings on their tails) are from Madagascar. They live till they're about 27. Lemur groups are ruled by the females who always win in fights. Lemur mums keep their babies in their mouths until they're big enough to sit on their backs. They always keep their tails up as a sort of signpost to keep their group together. And they enjoy eating flowers and sunbathing.

Jess

The Jane Austen (sorry - Pawsten) romance continues between Bollinger and Jess.

Jess darted into the house last night and sprinted comically all over the living room then upstairs, before settling down for a snooze in the olive tree pot. Boll just looked bemused. At least she's stopped hissing at him now. I'll keep you posted.

Bollinger posing this morning

I slept very badly last night and was lying awake at 2am feeling peeved about my shoulder which was aching after I pulled it at the gym.

Suddenly - a gentle scratch on the door. It was Boll.

I let her in and she leapt straight up onto the bed, snuggled up to the precise point where my shoulder was hurting and stayed there for several hours till it was better.

Bollinger has been assisting me over the last few days as I've been dubbing some of my video archive onto DVD. Here she is in the gallery, guarding a DVC tape.

This week's pin-up is a baby chipmunk.

This week's pin-up Louise kindly agreed to do a photoshoot yesterday in the grounds of Hertford Castle. James was the art director and official stick thrower. Louise was accompanied by her friend Nancy the labrador.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Louise from Hertford. Louise is James's cuddly canine companion. She enjoys food, strolling through town and sitting in the car (with her seatbelt on) chatting to James who is her best friend.

Introducing Jess, who lives nearby in a wooden house and visits Boll most evenings for a chat. It's been a bit on-off. At first, Boll hissed and growled at him. But she's mellowed and they now sit near each other in the garden and exchange smalltalk and pleasantries. However - I feel that Percy the Persian, who lives in a cottage by the river, may be a more Bollinger-friendly match. Percy has blue eyes and looks like a cross between a lion and a poodle. I'll keep you posted.

Boll enjoys her daily grooming routine and often leaves her tongue sticking out afterwards by mistake. This is a pic of her grooming today.

Bollinger spent today planting some cornflowers and French lavender, then impersonating a tiger in the bushes, then having a nice rest.

This week's pin-up is an opposum.

Bolly, looking regal

This week's pin-up is Bug the Parrot

Bollinger had her tail between her legs this morning - literally. See pic.

A French friend emailed me regarding last week's pin-up (a cat grooming a guinea pig).

Her comment -

'Mmmm. Wonder what it would taste like lightly sauteed in garlic with a herb butter dressing.'

I emailed back to say this confirmed my suspicion that the French ate cats, but she denied this, saying she was referring to the guinea pig. She clearly felt this was more acceptable.

Thank goodness for the English Channel.

A cat and guinea pig who are best friends (more great guinea pig stuff at cavymadness)

A pensive vole

the cube thing in the living room

my garden chair

the ironing cupboard

I saw and heard a cuckoo in the garden this morning. My first ever sighting. It was like encountering a mythical creature from a medieval bestiary and cheered me up enormously. It was quite scraggy-looking but had a beautiful voice. A perfect metaphor for a radio presenter.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Bollinger. I took these pix of her at the weekend.

A Mini Schnauzer Puppy

Persephone

More Persephone Pix

Here are some pix taken today of Bolly's morning routine...

Introducing the delightful Daisy from Wiltshire

Boll, trying to open a birthday present intended for her friend James. She eventually did open it and got inside the bag.

Thank you to this week's Herts Mercury for catapulting Bollinger to even dizzier heights of feline fame.

Boll was joined in the Mercury by her friend Shirley Basset, who used to live next door. I spotted Shirley modelling in an article about Pet Week at Photography by Louise on St Andrew Street.

Bollinger will be appearing alongside Lenny Henry, an amazing family from Norwich, a [male] cat called Daisy, a forgetful curate, an ugly dog and - um - me, in a Comic Relief real-life story today (Thursday 15th March) at 10.03pm on BBC Radio 2. It's called It Could Be You.

Boll appears in the programme because Daisy was rather taciturn and I needed some cat sound effects to boost his presence.

Below is an exclusive excerpt from Bollinger's cameo. I feel she deserves an Oscar for Best Supporting Pet.

Bolly's BBC Appearance

Having been an indoor cat for quite a while, Boll is now spending some supervised time in the garden which is enclosed and cat-friendly. She spent her first few trips sitting on the doorstep happily eating plants. But this morning, she was alarmed to find a duck sitting on the wall. She wasn't sure what it was, so she ran indoors and hid under the coffee table.

Bollinger is sooooo useful sometimes.

The new DVD player has arrived and has been officially inspected by Boll.

A kitten sticking its tongue out

Bollinger was grooming herself this morning. Then she stopped. But she left her tongue sticking out. Just the tip. Why?

I suspect she'd just forgotten it was out. But one theory is that it's a sign of affection and indicates that your cat's totally relaxed with you.

Animal Planet discussion of the cat tongue question

Apparently, dog owners are healthier than cat owners, because they walk more and because dogs are more easy-going.

I've always had cats, but I'm neither a cat person nor a dog person. I like both. And I think they're much more similar than most people think.

Boll is very affectionate and sociable, like a dog. So she's very relaxing to be with. This could be because she was partly brought up by an extremely friendly dog - Charlie.

But I also think it's about your approach. If you treat a cat like a stereotypical cat, it becomes one. If you show it affection, it returns it.

Bolly celebrating Christmas in her inimitable style

Bolly on my parents' sofa

Bolly's at my parents' house for Christmas. She went up early as I was supposed to be moving house today and I didn't want to ruffle her. But I'm now moving in the first week of January - I think. Mum phoned tonight to say Boll was watching a documentary about lion cubs and was trying to get inside the TV to play with them.

Bollinger of Cricklewood

Bollinger has a namesake in London. The 'other' Bollinger is a 14-year-old Abyssinian who also likes snoozing upside down and gets on well with dogs. He even has his own Blog. Thank you to his human for getting in touch.

Bollinger's had a very odd week. She sprained her elbow on Monday and had to have an anti-inflammatory injection.

The injection then made her sick. So she had to go on a 24-hour starvation diet.

Now she's on a chicken-only diet for a day or two. She's still limping slightly, but seems perfectly happy now she can eat again.

I put a box file on my bed earlier while I was tidying my bedroom. And where did Bollinger decide to have a nap? On the nice cosy duvet? No. On the box file.

Mouse, impersonating a nun in the Sound of Music

Breaking News. There are new photos of Mouse on Fran's website.

Alfie the Jack Russell lives with Matt and Jaime in Banbury and runs his own website which also features his friend Molly from Oxford.

Alfie, celebrating Halloween

Molly, looking very cute

This is my next door neighbour answering the door. We often go for walks together. Yesterday, we went to the pet shop for some dog treats.

Boll, posing at the top of the stairs this weekend ...

... and doing a spot of mousing

Sad news. Fran's cat Teddy died last week during an operation which revealed he had an aggressive and terminal form of cancer. I didn't meet Teddy but I was a big fan and followed his progress. Here's an excerpt from Fran's tribute to him:

Three days ago I had to make the awful decision to have Teddy put to sleep.
Even if he came round from the anaesthetic, he would only live for a day or two. So the best thing was to give the go-ahead for him to go while he was still asleep. Which was what I did. I went in a couple of hours later to say goodbye to him. Emma had wrapped him in a towel, and she and Danny were incredibly kind to me while I held him in my arms and told him how much I loved him.

It's so hard to get my head round how quickly he's gone. He's left an enormous hole in my heart. I miss him from all his favourite sleeping places; I miss him rushing downstairs when I got home in the evening, then jumping up onto the table to examine any plastic bag; I miss his gorgeous orange mackerel markings and slightly scabby pink paw pads; I miss playing fish on a string with him; I miss his enormous motor-boat purr; I miss his great furry bulk draped over my knees; I miss him at night when he'd jump up onto the pillow next to me and gently put a paw on my hand. I miss him and I want him back.

Teddy, you could not have been a more wonderful cat. I wanted to spend years with you, but at least we had five months together. It's not nearly long enough but I hope I made you as happy as you made me. Goodbye, my bold boy.

Bollinger, demonstrating the artistic principles of chiaroscuro and contre jour

Alfie lives with Matt and Jaime in Banbury and is quite a character, as you can see.

Alfie with his friend Molly from Oxford

Boll had a long lie in this morning as it's Sunday.

Here are some photos I took of Monty on Friday. Monty's 17 and lives in Wymondham in Norfolk. We brought him up as a small child in Cambridge. As you can see, he's on very good form. His hobbies include sitting on the lawn and under his favourite shrub.

The fabulous and very sweet Bollinger is seven today. She's been celebrating by eating organic chicken cat food and watching TV.

Alfie lives with Matt and Jaime in Banbury and is a real character, as you can see.

The cat next door and her kittens having a siesta this afternoon

And another siesta indoors

Fran's cute cats Teddy and Mouse (Mouse is the one who looks shocked)

More Pix

Oh dear. I got a cat video for Boll and she liked it. That was fine. But now she's obsessed with the TV and watches it whenever it's on.

Yesterday, she watched BBC Breakfast News and was fascinated by the traffic bulletins - particularly the Hanger Lane Gyratory System.

Then she watched Big Brother last night and Popworld this morning (yes - I have very highbrow tastes).

What am I to do? She's supposed to get as much exercise as possible. And my psychologist friend Aric says she may get ADHD. This is all my fault.

Boll, watching Mastermind

Bollinger has a new video. It was made exclusively for cat viewers, so it consists of mice, bluetits, blackbirds, gerbils, fish and so on - all scuttling around the screen, accompanied by a cacophony of bird and animal noises. As soon as I put it on, Boll shot into the room and was gripped from start to finish. She was absurdly excited by the partridge section for some reason (I felt the plot dragged at that point) and tried to catch them by launching herself at the screen.

Boll interacts with a partridge

Bollinger, getting uncontrollably excited about the World Cup

Bollinger may be eccentric, and may often act like a human or a dog, and may often be mistaken for a boy cat, and may have an obsession with technology and radios. But she is not - I repeat NOT - an alien in disguise. This is a wicked rumour started by my friend Henrietta, who is convinced that Boll is spying on humanity and secretly relaying messages to her mothership. Henrietta has just seen the fridge-top photos and emailed me the following:

'Pictures on Peacockshock confirm my fears that Boll is transmitting.'

No. Boll is not transmitting. She's just sitting on a fridge next to a radio. End of.

On windowsill sentry duty

Keeping an eye on me in the office

Relaxing in the living room

This week's pin-up is Dostoyevsky the hamster from Waltham Abbey in Essex. He's quite old and short-sighted, but very active. His hobbies include eating grapes and running on his wheel.

This week's pin-up is the lovely Teddy from Tottenham. Fran has adopted Teddy and Mouse from a cat shelter. They're both doing well following an initial attack of shyness.

I did some gardening yesterday assisted by Baby Basset who helped by carrying an old gardening glove around and digging random holes.

Some Cockerpoos

I noticed a very cute dog outside Waitrose the other day and asked its owner what it was. "A Cockerpoo," he replied. "A cross between a Cocker Spaniel and a Poodle. Poodle combinations are very fashionable. They had a Labradoodle on TV last night."

A Labradoodle

This week's pin-up is the lovely Monty from Wymondham in Norfolk.

Mo and Flo's hutch/run has a new home, which I'm sure they'd approve of. It's now in my neighbour's mum's garden and is occupied by Hagrid.

Hagrid's a giant rabbit who arrived on Halloween, hence his name.

My friend Fran has written this tribute to her wonderful cat Livia...

In memory of my darling Livia, who left for rainbow bridge early on Monday morning.

Livvy chose me when I visited a rather dodgy rescue centre in Sept 2000...she sat on a box and gave me a look, and that was it. Livvy was never a lap girl...but she loved her spot beside me on the sofa, and always herded me to bed at night. She quacked rather than mewed, hence proving that she was is fact that rare breed, the duck puss.

Her favourite spot was on top of the kitchen work surface, where she had a fleece bed. There she could keep an eye on me and the food bowl. She was also very fond of bags, and thoroughly investigated each new arrival. She was the most affectionate girl, and loved having her neck and ears rubbed.

She gave me six wonderful years of love and quacks, and I miss her most terribly. My house isn't a home without her.

Sleep tight, my gorgeous girl, and run free at the bridge.

My lovely Florence died this morning. She was running around the garden only a few days ago and spent yesterday afternoon sunbathing in the garden while I was sitting out. It was all very quick and she was in no pain. She developed a balance problem early today and just fell asleep at the vets. I was with her and told her I loved her.

She was a fantastic friend to Mo and always groomed and looked after him. She was depressed when he died, but started to be pretty lively again over the last week or so. Flo and I became better friends than ever over the last few days.

I first met Florence when I went to a pet shop to look for a new friend for Mo after his brother Chandon died. She kept coming up to me in the shop and was definitely saying hello and asking to live with me. She was one year old and she'd lived in the pet shop all her life.

When she first arrived in Hertford, she was quite nervous and would sometimes run up the ramp and stamp her foot in a huff. But she gradually became tamer and tamer and more and more affectionate.

She loved sitting next to Mo. But she sometimes sat upstairs in the hutch by herself, looking out at me through the corner of her eye. And, every now and then, she'd build herself a nest in the hay.

Here are some snapshots of Florence from my diary, starting in the pet shop when she introduced herself:

Rabbit with big ears and pointy nose kept coming up to glass. Very friendly. Florence. One year old.

Introduced Flo to Mo. Alternated between chasing and grooming. Flo's ears much bigger than Mo's.

Florence burrowing and generally wrecking the garden.

Flo grooming Mo.

Flo protecting Mo.

Florence building a nest.

Took Florence to vets for jabs. Behaved impeccably. Sat up and put paws on catbox while being poked.

Flo sunbathing.

Flo sprinting round garden.

I'll miss her terribly. She was a real sweety. I can't believe both Flo and Mo aren't here any more. Well, they are here in my heart and I'll always love them. Bless them.

Flo grooming Mo

This week's pin-up is Bollinger, snapped this morning by the catarrazzi while peeping out from the cubby hole in her fluffy blue tower.

Florence doing a rain dance (click for nice big pic)

It's April. Sunny one minute. Rainy the next. That means I spend all day running in and out of the house, putting Florence into her sheltered run/hutch and then letting her out again.

The problem is: whenever I put her in, the sun comes out. And as soon as I let her out, it starts raining again.

She seems to be turning into a sort of English groundhog, causing changes in the weather. I fear she may be personally responsible for global warming.

As you probably know by now, Mo the rabbit passed away last weekend. I still feel very sad and miss him a lot. I keep imagining him in the garden and I kept expecting him to interfere sweetly when I was cleaning Flo's litter tray yesterday.

Florence seems OK and she's eating fine, but she has been looking around the garden as if she's searching for him.

I also mislaid loads of things this week - like my watch, which went awol for days. A classic sign of bereavement.

I'm still going to keep all my Mo entries on Peacockshock (in the garden, with all the pets) but you may have noticed I've put a photo of Bolly on the right of the front page instead of Mo. It was lovely to see him, but it made me feel sad every time I checked the site.

I'm sure he'd understand, being a very understanding rabbit.

My lovely rabbit Moët passed away peacefully at the weekend. I was with him, stroking him. And, even though he was too weak to stand up, he was looking at me all afternoon with his little nose twitching sweetly. He just fell asleep gently. He wasn't in any pain or distress at all. It was just old age. He was almost seven.

I'm very sad about it, but he was an amazing pet and friend and had a really nice life. He also had a huge number of fans. Even people who didn't like rabbits liked Mo. He was always sweet and calm and never harmed anything or anyone.

I first met him on July 17th 1999, when I got back to Oxford on a Saturday evening to discover two baby rabbits in a hutch on the patio. They were a surprise present from my friend James. At first, I said: "No. I'm not having rabbits. Too much responsibility." But, after ten minutes, I'd changed my mind and already fallen in love with them. We called them Moët and Chandon as they were a silky silvery champagne colour. They were brothers and had matching white noses. But Mo was slightly larger, with a more rounded white nose patch, and a white paw too. They were great friends.

A neighbour made a large hutch for them, with a run connected to it and they lived in the garden. But they often came into the house and got on very well with Bollinger the cat when she arrived (her name continuing the champagne theme). They loved the lawn and used to both stand in a queue to jump onto my lap when I sat with them. Their favourite sitting place was a paving stone on some bricks, inside the run. They nearly always sat on it symmetrically. And their favourite food was Spring Greens. Mo also loved green beans.

He was extremely tame and friendly, but was shyer than Chandon and liked to hide his face in Chandon's fur. They often made a nest of hay to sit in. And, one winter, a fieldmouse moved in to live with them for a while. Mild-mannered Mo and Chandon seemed perfectly happy about this. In fact, Mo seemed to get on well with all species. I recently found him nose-to-nose with a cat in the garden and he was totaly unruffled. He was just curious.

He loved his toys and was very keen on moving them. He really enjoyed picking up his pink and mauve plastic ball and throwing it out of the way. He also enjoyed helping me when I cleaned out the litter tray and always stayed around to watch. Sometimes, he just sat in the tray chewing a bit of hay when I moved it.

He was extremely good at sitting around looking vague, which led to quite a few health scares - thankfully all false alarms. But that was just Mo. He was unbelievably calm and tame. He loved eating Suparabbit out of my hand and was always complimented by the vet for good behaviour when he had his jabs. One diary entry reads: 'Mo complimented by vet for being sweet and well-behaved.' He even made fans when I carried him to the vets in the catbox and people would compliment him in the street for being so cute.

He loved sitting in the rain too - even in the snow - and often had to be dried with a towel. But, on very cold nights, he'd come inside and sleep in my room, usually waking me up with chewing and scuffling noises. He wasn't mad on hot weather though, and lay flat-out on hot days, molting in ridiculous clumps. I described him once in my diary as a 'scruffy urchin.'

When the rabbits were three, I moved from Oxford and they stayed at Danny and Viv's down the road in the garden next to the aviary. The rabbs then moved to Newcastle for a while, as I was staying with my parents before moving to Hertford. They lived in a run on the patio, and we watched them more than we watched the TV. My parents loved them. And, as Mum wasn't too well and I was away a lot, Dad looked after them for a few months. Mo and Dad were very good pals and, after little Chandon died (when he was 3½), Dad made a special fuss of Mo. But I wanted him to have some bunny company, so he moved down south again to stay with Frank, Henrietta and their rabbits.

Then, after a slightly peripatetic year, he moved with me to Hertford, where he's lived for the last three years. It was here that he met Florence. Flo was one when I got her from a petshop. And they were introduced in a cardboard box in the back of a friend's car, being driven around Essex. This may seem odd, but putting rabbits in a strange situation, in a confined space, is a classic way of helping them bond.

It worked very well, and they were best pals from the day they met. Flo, being larger and more extrovert, was very protective of Mo and was always grooming him and letting him hide his face in her fur. They nearly always sat together, as if watching an invisible rabbit television. She taught him how to burrow too, and my diary reveals that he became more and more adventurous the older he got:

'Super-Mo attacked cardboard box.'

'Mo and Flo attacked box and destroyed tree trunk.'

'Moët high up in rockery on top of blue pot.'

'Rabbits running round in insane circles.'

'Mo up on rockery. Tips of rabbit ears moving around visible from upstairs.'

And, only last week, I had to send out a search party at dusk as it looked as if he'd disappeared :

'Discovered Mo hiding behind plant pots.'

But Mobes enjoyed nothing more than sitting cosily in some hay. My diary from a few weeks ago reads: 'Moët made a nest and sat in it with his nose sticking out.'

He loved his food and is always described in my diary as 'wolfing' it. Just last week, he wolfed a 'honey stick' rabbit treat (a small wooden stick coated with seeds and honey - his favourite.) And he ate quite a lot of small apple slices at the weekend even though he was frail.

He only became frail a couple of weeks ago - just looked a bit old and smaller, but the vet said he absolutely wasn't suffering. He was just getting on a bit. He came up to stay in my room at the weekend and, on Saturday, Boll and Flo popped in to see him and Florence groomed him.

When I was ill in hospital last year, one of the things that kept me going was thinking of Mo and Flo in the garden sitting by the foxgloves, and looking forward to seeing them again.

I'll always remember how Mo used to run up to me at the gate when I went into the garden to see them. I'd stroke him and he'd nudge my hand when I stopped, to ask me to stroke him more.

He was such a sweet rabbit. I'll always love him and I'll miss him terribly. But I'm sure he's in heaven now, looking down on us all and happily nibbling some nice green beans. Bless him. Mo was totally amazing and brought so much happiness to my life. I'll never forget him.

Some pix of the very sweet basset puppy I'm currently taking for walks around Hertford

Boll, doing her Bloomsbury look

Mo, being swashbuckling on the pebble terrace

Flo and Mo, hiding behind some hay

Herman

My rabbit Florence is quite rotund and weighs over 3 kg (Moët's a sensible 2 kg).

But that's nothing, compared to Rudi and Herman - two German Giants in the news this week. They weigh over 7 kg - the weight of a pretty hefty toddler and even more than my cat Bollinger (6 kg).

My new hobby is taking my neighbour's basset hound puppy for walks around Hertford. On our first walk yesterday, about 15 people spoke to me, via the puppy - well, actually they spoke to the puppy, occasionally glancing up at me.

The same thing happened when I used to walk a fluffy and somewhat camp Lhasa Abso dog around Soho and Covent Garden when I lived in London.

People normally don't speak to me at all around town, except to sell me The Big Issue - talking of which, I only ever buy it from vendors with cute dogs, as I feel more sorry for their pets than I do for them. Which brings me to my idea...

We have Guide Dogs For The Blind and Hearing Dogs For The Deaf. Why not Talking Dogs For The Shy? Adorable puppies which shy retiring people can take for walks, inspiring dog-related conversations.

Bolly, posing this morning

The rabbits this afternoon

Mo and Flo celebrated Groundhog Day by sitting in a nest of hay. They were so lazy, they couldn't even be bothered to check out their shadows.

Click on pic to enlarge

Boll wishes to thank Viv, Danny and Tigger for her tent. By the way, you can click on this pic to enlarge it. This wondrous facility has returned after a short break.

I bought some DMs today. Bolly commandeered the box as her new HQ.

Bollinger decided to use a binbag as her HQ yesterday. Don't tell Lady Bracknell. Thank you.

A rabbit was caught on CCTV this morning, trespassing in an olive tree pot belonging to broadcaster Ian Peacock.

The rabbit (seen here escaping) had managed to jump almost a metre into the terracotta pot, previously thought to be bunny-proof. The olive tree, known as 'Nana', survived intact.

Hertfordshire Pet Police are not treating the incident as suspicious. They have identified the bunny as Florence Peacock, 3, of Hertford. No previous convictions. Florence was not available for comment and is now thought to be in hiding in her hutch with a companion who goes by the name of 'Mo'.

Reuters

Bollinger discovering snow when she was a kitten

Boll visiting Moët and his brother Chandon

Snow Mo

Florence makes her BBC debut

Models: Mo and Flo
Agency: Superrabbit

I spent this weekend in Waltham Abbey, pet-sitting for Frank and Henrietta and walking retired greyhounds from Whittingham Kennels with Fran. The greyhounds were all very affectionate. Joe and Lady were the shyest ones. Joe had agoraphobia, but we managed to take Lady out for a walk in the woods.

Joe and Lady

Fran and Michelle

Martha

Maud

Dex and Maud

Dex

Lex and Dex

Bolly's Podcast

Click on the link to hear Bollinger having breakfast this morning - I'm Boll's voiceover agent by the way, in case you want to hire her.

This year, I've covered the rabbits' double-decker run/hutch in fashionable foil bubblewrap, with optional red immersion heater covers. It's very important to wrap up outdoor rabbits in the winter. On extremely cold nights, some people put their bunnies in a shed or porch or in an unheated room in the house. Mo and Flo have decided to sit outside this morning, making themselves into fluffy balls to fend off the cold.

Rabbit Welfare Association

Florence (aka Flo) is three today. She came to live with Mo and me when she was one, after spending the first year of her life in a pet shop in Crews Hill. In the pet shop, she kept coming up to me as if she was asking to come home. Florence is a very good friend to Mo and grooms him a lot. He's smaller and quieter than her. Flo has much longer ears. She used to be quite shy and ran off and stamped her foot when I tried to stroke her. But now she eats out of my hand and comes up to me in the garden, though she's still quite wary of unexpected noises and strangers. Flo is a very good runner and likes doing 'binky' (jumping for no reason and rotating mid-air). She has an allergy problem and sometimes sneezes, but she's very perky and well apart from that. She had organic carrots (with green frondy tops), green beans and a cox's orange pippin for breakfast this morning and is now running round the garden. Happy Birthday Florence.

Cat Burglar Fleeing Filing Cabinet

A mysterious cat burglar was caught on Peacockshock's security cameras today, attempting to infiltrate some confidential files.

The cat burglar's profile was caught on CCTV. The feline in question was described by witnesses as "tabby-and-white, pink-nosed, aged about 6, very sweet, but enormously plump".

I'm a big fan of pet expert Celia Haddon and her website, which includes some very sweet Victorian and Edwardian pet postcards.

Moet and Florence, posing in the garden this morning...

It's Halloween. So here's a deeply frightening photograph of my personal witch's familiar Grey Bollingerkin, posing menacingly next to a spectral pumpkin.

Some new pix of Boll snoozing, at the top of the stairs and under my duvet...

Bollinger, when she was a random kitten

The Random Kitten Generator is wondrous. There are 812787 kittens on it.

Now it's officially autumn, Bollinger has resumed sleeping in her box near the radiator. She's also taken to sitting, for the first time ever, inside her fluffy blue tower. And my Nike rucksack is very in this autumn as a cat sofa.

Sad news. Wilson the dog died this week. Here's Bob's tribute to her...

I still remember the day Wilson came into our life.

Carolyn came back from the animal home and told me we should go in and see this dog ... just for a look.

For nearly an hour, we sat in an enclosure with a large black dog who stayed as far away as possible while keeping a wary eye on us. But there was something about her which worked some magic on our souls and we arranged to at least try to take her into our home.

She spent weeks hiding, under beds, under the table, anywhere to get away from people. She'd sneak out and get her dinner and sneak back again. But as her confidence grew, we found we had the most placid dog in the world.

While afraid of anyone she didn't know, especially children, in all her years she never even bared her teeth at anyone or anything. Not a growl or a snap over nine years.

I remember her first big walk outside, along the riverside at Kew. The moment she saw some people she dived into the undergrowth and took half an hour to be coaxed out.

Everywhere she lived she had her favourite place. In Ireland, she sat near the bottom of the steps up to our flat watching the world go by. Our grass in Norfolk still bears the bald patch where she would lie every day to woof at passers by.

And now she's gone. She'd always had a bit of a problem with her joints. An x-ray revealed she had fused vertabrae. That led to paralysis. And eventually she could do no more for herself and we could do no more for her.

Goodbye Wilson.

Love you.

Bob and Carolyn

My rabbit Moët's modelling career has been boosted by an appearance in the BBC's prestigious Ariel magazine. Moët denies he's become a prima donna. But he won't get out of bed nowadays for less than a Waitrose carrot.

Bolly's 6 today. She's celebrated so far by getting up and howling at 5am, biting me, eating a very large breakfast of diet food, attempting to eat the rabbits' breakfast (spring greens), opening her card from my parents (featuring a bluetit), and playing with her new toys: a green feather-duster-type-thing and an orange fluffy-mouse-type-object in a hosepipe (US Patent 5,782,207), described in the instructions as "le jeu parfait pour faire 'coucou' au petit chat". Boll's certainly a 'chat' but is far from 'petit'. She's a lovely pet though and incredibly sociable - she insists on having her own chair at the dinner table and always runs down the stairs to greet me when I come home. Her hobbies include eating, sleeping, eating, eating and eating. And eating. Happy Birthday Bolls.

Boll's sister Tigger, who lives in Oxford, is also 6 today. So are her two plump brothers Piggy and Anonymous. Like Bollinger, Tigtogs thinks she's a dog. Her hobbies include eating, drinking milk, sticking her tongue out, and running rapidly into the catflap in a panic. She had two kittens a while ago (on the kitchen floor) and appeared extremely surprised at this.

Boll contemplates this question

I've never seen a cat in Welwyn Garden City. But, curiously, it's full of dogs. The newsagents are full of dog-themed magazines, but no cat ones whatsoever. Why is this?

Bollinger's ear's now fine. So she's no longer wearing her silly bonnet.

The back garden bears an uncanny resemblance to Jurassic Park this morning, after the rabbits spent the weekend marauding like crazed Visigoths. Having implemented a ruthless deforestation program, they attempted to dig a new Channel Tunnel link in the herbacious border, next to the foxgloves. Then they tried some experimental Dadaist topiary on the bushes and rounded it off by mugging an unsuspecting ivy plant. I'll never forget those writhing roots and pitiful screams. But, oddly, I just don't care. Despite the fact they deserve Asbos, I love Moet and Florence. And they're very cute and affectionate (which you can't really say about plants).

Moet seemed slightly under the weather last weekend, so I took him to the vets. The vet thought he might have a small fur ball. So he recommended a course of ... pineapple juice. I gave him about half a carton of the Waitrose version (in small doses - via a syringe). And he was fine within 24 hours. Pineapples are wondrous things and contain an enzyme-rich substance called bromelain which is very good for you.

Bollinger's also been in the wars. She's on a short course of antibiotics after scratching her ear (and actually likes the tablets, as they've cleverly made them taste like cat treats). The Bollster also has to wear a very fetching blue hat to prevent further scratching.

Chandon (left) and Moet

It's 6 years since I got home to discover two baby rabbits, Moet and Chandon, on my patio in Oxford - a present from James. Sadly, Chandon died a couple of years ago. Mo, just turned 6, now lives with his new pal Florence, 2, in the back garden in Hertford.

Mo and Chand again

Mo, celebrating his 6th birthday recently with Florence

Model: Bollinger Peacock
Location: Dining room
Photography: Me

Big thanks to Frank for giving me a fantastic giant poster of Bollinger. Boll was present at its unveiling. She ate lots of canapés.

Reuters: Moet and Florence, the 'Hertford Two', are currently confined to their hutch and run after deciding to burrow all over broadcaster Ian Peacock's garden and eat most of his plants. "I don't know where I went wrong," said Peacock. "I brought them up so well. But I fear they may have got into drugs at prep school." The rabbits now face an ASBO (Anti-Social Bunny Order). If you see them in the Hertford area, do not approach them as they may be dangerous. Moet is described as "cute and fluffy with a white nose". Florence has "long ears, a white tail and a sweet pointy nose."

variegated privet bush
after Moet's makeover -
rabbit deforestation
project continues

I'm flattered to see that my chav images of Bollinger, Charlie, Tigger (and an anonymous gerbil) have started to surface on other sites (eg. click here and scroll down). I'm hoping Boll might get a lucrative modelling contract with Burberry or Adidas to fund her pet-jet-set lifestyle.

Moet and Florence have been leaping in the air a lot today, flicking their heads and rotating mid-jump. This behaviour apparently means they're happy and it's known by rabbitologists as "binky". I'm a big fan of The Language of Lagomorphs which has a great binky section and loads of tips on communicating with your bunny. Binky has now been elevated to rabbit showjumping in Sweden and the UK. And bunny hopping is also very popular in Florida.

Rabbit showjumping in Sweden

This rabbit was rescued and was OK after his ambitious jump

The lovely Louis, who lives with Caroline in a cottage on the west coast of Scotland.

Here are some new rabbit pix, taken on my new zoom lens this afternoon as Mo and Flo pootled round the garden.

Bollinger, watching television and hogging the remote - taken this morning on my new digital camera.

Florence had a good night's sleep in my room and a Full English Bunny Breakfast of hay and green beans. She's now out in the hutch/run again with Mo. So we're all happy bunnies.

as i write, with my left (ie. wrong) hand (see entries below), i'm off-my-face on painkillers, getting mildly tipsy on cabernet due to stress, and there's a stoned rabbit in my bedroom (not dylan from the magic roundabout, but little florence who had her tooth trimmed today under anaesthetic). but all's well apart from that.

Bollinger enjoys sitting on my laptop keyboard and occasionally running across it. Today, she ran across it en route to the window sill and produced the following cryptic message:

0p--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------# jxq

Please send me a translation if you speak cat. On the other hand, you may wish to trace Bollinger's footsteps on your own keyboard or attempt to get your cat to type a reply.

A month ago, I was going on about telepathic animals (see garden section). And you may recall I challenged you to read, telepathically, what I was thinking about when I was writing. Several people emailed me and got it hopelessly wrong I'm afraid. But, just in case you wanted to know, I was thinking about Moet's nose. Moet is the white-nosed rabbit whose photo appears on the top right-hand side of the main page of Peacockshock and in the snow portrait below. I'm sure you'll agree, it's a very sweet nose.

Dave's cats Poda and Panda, 16, live near Leicester and are very sweet.

Boll's latest perch is the office windowsill

Animal Telepathy Practitioner Raphaela Pope

Did the animals of South East Asia know the Tsunami was coming? Very few animals appear to have died in the disaster, prompting speculation that they somehow received warning signals and ran inland. BBC Tsunami Animals Article. This doesn't surprise me in the least. My guinea pig Tog was telepathic and my cat and rabbits do seem to know what I'm about to do. This could, of course, be because I'm somehow behaving in a 'preparatory' way. But there is endless anecdotal evidence that animals are telepathic/psychic (ie. can predict when their humans are coming home and so on). And birds too. Birds tapping on windows or entering houses are widely said to be omens of death. It's reported that birds avoid places where evil has occurred, such as Auschwitz (where I recall noticing a distinct lack of birdsong). There's also copious evidence that pets can predict epilepsy. And Dr Rupert Sheldrake has written extensively and pretty convincingly about pets (and humans) with a sixth sense and access to forcefields. His website even includes an experiment which you can participate in. By the way...as I write this, what am I thinking about? Don't think too hard. Email me now (via the contacts page, or directly on ian@peacockshock.com) I'll report back with the results soon. Or send them to you in a thought wave.

Happy New Year. I spent last night at Frank and Henrietta's having a splendid dinner and playing a ridiculous but very amusing game called Balderdash. Maud the cat and hamsters Tolstoy and Dostoyevsky behaved terribly well. Sadly, the same can't be said for Alexis and Dexter the Persians who slightly overdid it...