Monthly Archives: January 2007

Godot Arrives


The washing machine installer, who looked like David Beckham in a bobble-hat, turned up at 10. But he couldn’t fit it. ‘Sorry mate,’ he said (mate? mate? Hello?) ‘You haven’t got the right spiggot and your hose isn’t long enough.’
I now have to wait till Thursday, when my friend Pete from Suffolk is coming to Hertford. He knows about such things.

Waiting for Godot


I’ve been up since the crack of dawn because my new washing machine is due to arrive between 7 and 11 this morning. That means, of course, that it will arrive at three seconds to 11, if indeed it arrives at all.

Why Do Cats Stick Their Tongues Out?


A kitten sticking its tongue out
Bollinger was grooming herself this morning. Then she stopped. But she left her tongue sticking out. Just the tip. Why?
I suspect she’d just forgotten it was out. But one theory is that it’s a sign of affection and indicates that your cat’s totally relaxed with you.
Animal Planet discussion of the cat tongue question

Endless Senseless Interactive Book

The Endless Senseless Interactive Book aims to become the longest webpage ever. The idea is that you go to the page and just write anything you want to, without thinking about it too much. It’s essentially a collective piece of automatic writing.
I haven’t written anything yet, but intend to, perhaps after a few glasses of wine.
I’m also tempted to place Bollinger on my keyboard to see what happens.
In fact, I’m going to do so now.
cccccc“`v#
That’s what she wrote. I’m now going to put it into the Endless Senseless Interactive Book. This is very exciting.
I’ve just entered Boll’s great literary work. Go to the Endless Senseless Interactive Book now and put ‘bollinger’ in your ‘find’ thingy.

Gillian the Impaler


Dr Gillian McKeith
I’m watching her on TV as I write. She’s currently showing her sobbing victim a choc-ice in the shape of a coffin. She’s the undead. She looks like a celery stick gone wrong. She ought to be locked in a MacDonalds, force-fed with burgers, impaled on a gherkin and then squashed to death by happy fat people – live on Channel 4.

This Cat May Damage Your Health

Apparently, dog owners are healthier than cat owners, because they walk more and because dogs are more easy-going.
I’ve always had cats, but I’m neither a cat person nor a dog person. I like both. And I think they’re much more similar than most people think.
Boll is very affectionate and sociable, like a dog. So she’s very relaxing to be with. This could be because she was partly brought up by an extremely friendly dog – Charlie.
But I also think it’s about your approach. If you treat a cat like a stereotypical cat, it becomes one. If you show it affection, it returns it.

Hertford on the Map


Hertford’s on the map. Finally.
After years of explaining to people where it is (‘Hertford – a nice old town 20 miles north of London … no … it’s not Hatfield or Harlow … yes … it’s in Hertfordshire…’) BBC London have now put it on their weather map. This is a wondrous marvel.