Monthly Archives: May 2007

Definitions of an Intellectual

‘Someone who, alone in a room with a tea cosy, doesn’t try it on.’ (that counts me out then) ‘Someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture and not think of the Lone Ranger.’ ‘Someone whose mind watches itself.’…

Tinky Winky Tot Terror

It’s good to know that Poland’s politicians have got their priorities right. In Warsaw political circles, the latest hot debate centres on the sexuality of a purple Teletubby. Apparently, Tinky Winky poses a grave threat to Polish toddlers. Because he…

You May Kiss The Proxy

You can now get married by double-proxy in Montana. In other words, you can get married via two stand-ins, so you don’t have to turn up for your own wedding. I assume you can also have a double-proxy honeymoon (or…

Lost in Translation

What happens when an English phrase is translated (by computer) back and forth between five or more different languages? You can now find out, thanks to an online Babeliser. I tried out some phrases and quotations and got some pretty…

Hertford Lookalikes Outbreak

When I first moved to Hertford, I kept seeing a man who looked like Jeremy Clarkson. When I told a friend about this, he said, ‘Oh yes. That’s the Jeremy Clarkson lookalike.’ I’ve no idea who he is, but he…